I Choose You by todream
by After Your Heart Stops Beating
Summary: AFTER YOUR HEART STOPS BEATING CONTEST ENTRY: Bella reflects on the moment she realized she loved Jacob Black, but does he still want her?


**After Your Heart Stops Beating One-Shot Contest**

**Story Title: I Choose You****  
****Pen name: todream****  
****Summary: Bella reflects on the moment she realized she loved Jacob Black, but does he still want her?****  
****Word Count: approximately 6,469****  
****To view other entries, go there:****http:/www (.) fanfiction (.) net/~afteryourheartstopsbeating****  
****Disclaimer: I don't own a damn thing. I just spend all my free time writing smutty scenarios for Jacob to be in, since SM didn't.**

**~o~O~o~**

"You know, I miss the brown," Jacob said to me as he washed his face in the sink, looking at my reflection in the mirror. We hadn't turned on the lights, but I could see him as clearly as if the sun were shining in through the polyester curtains of our cheap, motel room.

I didn't want to look at myself. I had been this way for a couple of months now, and I still hadn't grown used to it. Being a vampire was something I thought I'd wanted, something that would make me live forever in happiness. Now it was all different. I hadn't planned for it to go this way.

"Me, too," I whispered back, faking a smile. I, too, missed the color my eyes once were. At least the fiery red had died down a bit and was changing to the golden color I'd grown used to with the Cullens.

I watched him dry his face and place the towel back on the rack. The way he swaggered over to me made me catch a breath that I didn't even need to take. My new eyesight opened up a whole new world to me, and Jacob Black was even more beautiful than I had ever imagined he could be.

I knew he didn't have to be here with me, but he was. Once the venom began to spread, there was no going back to the old Bella. Jacob knew that, and yet, he stayed.

He stayed even though the whole pack was searching for us. He took me away after my attack and hid me while I screamed and burned through my transformation. Even though it was in his nature to kill me, he stuck with me as I awakened and was transformed into this new being. We had to learn together how to survive this way-a werewolf and a newborn vampire running from our imminent deaths.

I thought James was frightening not so long ago. I laughed at my ignorance. How little did I know then as a mere human.

The bed shifted when he sat next to me, reaching out for my hand. I gave him mine, and he laced our fingers together. I still had to get used to the feeling of his warmth on my hard, marble skin. I hoped he wasn't repulsed by me. I knew he would have liked me soft, warm, and preferably with a heart that pumped blood through my veins.

"Do you regret running away?" I asked, wanting to know if he hated his decision to protect me.

"Not once." His hand squeezed mine, reassuringly. "Don't you ever think I'd leave you, okay, Bells?"

"Okay," I whispered back. I leaned my head on his shoulder, and his arm wrapped around me, softly stroking my hair. "Even though I smell?" I joked.

"Hey, I'm the one that smells like a wet dog to you. It kind of makes us even, right?" he chuckled, squeezing me tighter.

"I guess so."

I closed my eyes and thought back to the day my feelings for Jacob changed, and my life took an irreversible turn.

~o~

"See you tomorrow, Bells?" he asked with his always hopeful smile, pulling me into his chest at the same time.

"Ow, Jake! Don't hurt me. I have a hard enough time keeping me from injuring myself," I exclaimed, feeling my shoulder hit his solid, newly-developed body, causing a sharp pain to travel from my arm to my upper back.

He was good at being a new werewolf, but he still didn't know how to control his own strength.

"Shit, I'm sorry," he said apologetically, easing up on his grip. I could feel his hands lightly rub my arm, trailing his thumb softly over my thin shirt. His good-bye's had become different lately, and that change scared me. His lips would linger a little too long at the hair around my temple, and I could feel him breathe me in, like he wanted to have my scent with him when I wasn't there. I wanted to love him back, like he loved me, but I was a basket case who didn't deserve him.

Any other girl would have been over the moon at such an embrace from him. Jacob was the perfect guy, after all. Beautiful, passionate, caring, and funny - he was everything a normal girl would want.

But I wasn't a normal girl. I was broken.

I was like the old nursery rhyme about the stupid egg who fell off the wall. As hard as everyone tried, they couldn't put it back together again. Beyond repair. Beyond hope. That's how badly I was hurt.

Those around me couldn't see my wounds, and I had so many. They weren't caused by my own hand, which was a pretty normal occurrence. On any given day, you could count the bruises or cuts I personally had caused all on my own, but these wounds were different. No one could see them. They were the worst kind: deep and never-healing. The most painful damage was the big hole that tugged at my gut. I had to pull my arms around me, just to keep myself from falling apart.

"Um...I gotta go, Jake. See you tomorrow," I mumbled quickly as I forced myself out of his hug. I could see the disappointment in his face at my rejection, but yet he never said anything. He was giving me time. I didn't know how long he'd wait for me to be normal again; I just knew that I needed him to help keep me together. I knew I was being selfish, and I would end up breaking his heart, but I couldn't stop myself.

When I was away from Jake, I often thought of _him _and what he had done to me. I didn't want to remember, even though the memories were hazy - like looking through murky water, they grew more solid and in place with time. That was one of the worst parts of this life - no matter how much I wanted, I would never forget him and the pain he caused when they left me. It would just happen, and the hole would immediately double in size. When the hurt was too much, I would run back to Jake, and he would shrink the hole a little bit, making the pain a dull ache. I would be fine until the darkness of night would come, and I'd have to leave the security of Jake and face my nightmares alone. Soon the thoughts of him, the one who left me helpless and alone in the woods, would creep into my mind, ripping off the bandage that Jacob kept trying to put there. It was a vicious cycle that I didn't know how to break.

I watched him wave good-bye from my rear-view mirror as I drove away, wishing I didn't have school tomorrow and always anxious for the next day to spend time with my best friend, pushing away my self-loathing thoughts of how awful I was to him.

~o~

The bitter cold hit my nose on my way out the door for school. I lost my focus and almost fell hard by slipping on the ice.

"Bella, you'll have to be more careful," I heard a familiar voice whisper to me. Was it _him_? No...it couldn't be. _He _was gone for good. _He _didn't love me anymore; he'd said so himself. I tried to get to my truck as fast as I could without slipping, attempting to get away from the crazy voice I'd just heard. Luckily, I didn't fall anymore and slammed my truck door shut, darting my wide eyes around like a crazy woman. I half-way wanted to hear his voice, but then again, I knew it would be bad for me. I couldn't take it. Hearing his soothing tone in my ears would do more harm than good. I watched the window fog as I tried to get my erratic breathing under control.

Trying to convince myself to go to school after what had just happened was quite amusing. I felt restless and needy. I could just imagine my body trying to sit in a tiny desk all day with my leg bouncing in impatience. I knew I would surely go crazy there today, pretending I was okay when I evidently wasn't. I just heard _his _voice. No sane person heard the voices of boyfriends who disappeared into thin air. I couldn't stand the thought of Lauren or Jessica witnessing my panic attack, giving more fodder for the gossip mill at Forks High.

Instead of taking my usual right to the main street through Forks, I kept heading North. I suddenly needed to get away, and I knew the place I wanted to find.

~o~

The forest had changed since _he _had taken me here_. _I didn't think I would remember the way it looked back then so vividly. Things did look different from what I recalled when I'd zoomed at light speed hitched to a vampire's back. Catching all the details of the foliage proved difficult when it whirred quickly past me, but I could still tell it'd changed. I hadn't forgotten anything. The colors were different, and the light shone through the tips of the trees more, which helped guide my way on such a cloudy day. The ground had stayed the same, rough and rocky, but without _him_, I was much more unstable. I had switched into my hiking boots that I kept in the truck to make sure my footing would have every advantage out here.

I had been hiking for a few hours, trying to keep my mind busy by repeating how to conjugate different verbs in Italian; needless to say, it didn't work. I knew finding this particular place would rip the bandage off my wound, making me remember _him _and how he had consumed me. What I sought would expose my raw feelings all over again. I knew it wasn't healthy to do this by myself, but something kept propelling me forward. I had to find the meadow.

Was it closure I was seeking? Did I still love Edward, or was I holding on to something I thought was love? Was I falling in love with Jacob? I thought I knew the answers, but I didn't. I guess I hoped that the answers I sought would be whispered to me in the wind somehow.

"Crap!" I yelled as I tripped on a loose section of soil, and a funny thing happened as I fell. The thought of Jacob helping me up off the ground flashed in my head. I could hear him ask if I was okay and could feel his strong but gentle touch helping me to my feet. Even though Edward's presence never left me, I was thankful that Jacob had broken through unexpectedly. Very unexpectedly.

Steadying myself upright again, I started on my mission and could somehow feel on my skin Jacob's thumb ghosting back and forth across my arm. It was so real, like I was with him.

I made my way up the hill, pushing through the ache in my feet and the fatigue my back felt from walking more than I was used to. I clawed at a bush that attacked me out of nowhere, causing me to shriek in surprise. Jacob's laughter rang in my head, making me laugh at myself in this moment at how clumsy I must have looked.

Getting away from the attacking, guerrilla bushes, I took a few steps forward, and suddenly I froze and couldn't breathe; my mind wasn't ready for what I saw. Whenever the healing part would come, whenever Jacob and his goodness would begin to stitch me back together, something that reminded me of _him _would show up without fail.

There in front of me, in all its wilted beauty, was the meadow. _Our _meadow.

I had no one to blame for my heartache right now but myself. I knew coming here would be painful, but I'd still decided to do it. I took a step or two on my wobbly legs, and soon, my body succumbed to the sadness I had lived with for months now. I melted into the tall grass, pulling my legs to my chest as I sobbed. I cried for what I thought I wanted and for what I had to let go of. I had held on to Edward for too long, thinking he'd somehow come back to me.

Catharsis came through my tears; with each one, the need for my old love and old life lessened, and the desire for my new future and new life with Jacob became stronger.

~o~

"Bella, you need to go..." I heard the same voice call to me, rousing me from my sleep. I didn't know how long I had been out, but I could tell dusk had settled all around. I panicked just a little, realizing that I wasn't prepared to be in the woods all night. I didn't want to be out here...alone. Was I alone, though? I had heard _him _again. Was _he _here?

"Go...now!" he urged again. My eyes searched everywhere, calling out to him as I looked.

"Edward? Edward!" I didn't receive an answer. "Would you just leave me alone?" I pleaded with the voice. "I can't take this anymore..."

I seemed to be going crazy, more insane than I already was. I couldn't keep doing this to myself. Holding on to someone who said he loved me and then left me wasn't good for me. I knew that. I deserved better.

I hurriedly got to my feet and wished that I could get cell phone coverage out in the middle of nowhere. I needed Jake to help get me out of here. I couldn't keep holding on to this figment of my imagination anymore. I deserved what was real and what was right in my life...and it was Jacob.

I desperately needed to get to him. I was being haunted by an old boyfriend and was stranded in the middle of the woods. Not a good combination for me. My mind, still foggy from my unwanted nap, tried to wake up. I kept telling myself I needed to go, but my body wouldn't cooperate.

Out of nowhere, a flash of red lit up the corner of my eye, brightening my peripheral vision for a split second. My body no longer felt sluggish and slow. Every nerve ending woke up, shocked into alertness.

_What the-_ I thought for a second, and the red flared again, closer to me this time. My heart began beating out of my chest because I knew one thing for certain.

I wasn't alone anymore.

My hair whipped across my face as I jerked my head toward the forest where I wanted to run. I had been around vampires enough to know that there were worse things than bears and mountain lions out in these parts. I assumed the worst, and my intuition told me that I was in serious trouble. I didn't need a creepy, ghost voice to fill me in on that fact.

I willed my feet forward, making a mad dash for the thick underbrush. I knew it was stupid to think I could escape because any vampire would be able to find me easily. I had been around Edward and his family enough to know that humans were weak compared to their kind. My blood sang to Edward and made his family doubt their abilities to abstain from human blood. Vampires seemed to like me, that is, except for the one I had wanted to like me.

"Bella," an ethereal voice called out to me before I could reach the meadow's edge.

I froze and turned around slowly, facing whoever had called out for me.

There she was, smiling a wicked smile, her red hair glowing in the twilight. I remembered her from the baseball game long ago. Why was she here now?

"You know, you're a hard girl to get alone these days," she said, walking closer to me.

"Have you been looking for me?" I asked, confused.

"It wasn't hard to find you...Bella," she said, emphasizing the L's in my name. "It's making sure you were by yourself that proved difficult. Your wolf friend and his constant watch over you was getting quite annoying." His constant watch? Did Jake look out for me when I didn't even know it?

I gasped unexpectedly, realizing my mistake. I had skipped school, and I told no one. Jake thought I was safe.

"W-w-why do you want to find me? Why would y-you follow J-Jake? He has n-nothing to do with you," I stuttered. It was disheartening to know Jacob and I had been watched without our knowledge. I didn't want him to get hurt because of me, even though I didn't know why I was remotely important to her.

"You don't have a clue, do you? You've been all I could think about since he died, and I haven't crossed your mind one bit, have I?"

"Since who died? I don't...don't understand. I only saw you once." I couldn't figure out why she would care about me.

"Don't you remember my mate...James?" she inquired, coming closer to me. I nodded my head _yes_, and it all made sense. Of course I remembered her mate. I had a crescent-shaped scar on my arm from his bite and constant nightmares because of him. Even though he was dead, the trauma I suffered because of him didn't go away.

I watched her smirk deviously, and the same fear I had for James washed over me again.

I knew then that she wanted me dead.

"I know Edward is gone. I've watched you suffer for a while now. Poor thing. I wish that were enough to make me spare your life, but I'm sorry to say that it isn't," she hummed.

My heart beat out of my chest, and my body grew limp after realizing this moment with her would be my last. Her cold hands caught me before I slammed to the earth in shock.

"Oh, don't pass out on me, Bella. I want you to experience every moment of your death. It won't be fun at all for Edward to re-play your death in my thoughts, if you're unconscious for it all. Revenge will be so much sweeter if he can see you in pain and slowly slipping away." Victoria breathed her words on my neck, bending me backwards in her arms as if dipping me in the middle of a dance.

"You do smell so good...this will be fun for me on so many levels."

"Go ahead and kill me then," I offered, knowing I was going to die now. Why prolong the inevitable? I'd escaped death once. I couldn't do it a second time.

I listened to her evil laugh and felt her grip on me tighten. She hissed as she placed her lips on my tender neck, right where my blood pulsed.

"Good-bye, Bella," she murmured.

"I did love you, Edward," I whispered one last time, making sure he'd hear those words re-played in Victoria's head; I wouldn't be here to let him know.

But my last thoughts before I felt her teeth pierce my skin weren't of Edward, they were of Jacob. The times we shared together in his garage, riding motorcycles around the rez, and just laughing with one another flickered through my consciousness. I kept those cherished memories to myself, wanting privacy for something I held so dear. My one regret was that I didn't let Jacob know how much I loved him. I would die, and he would live on not knowing. Tears rolled down my face, facing the sadness of my death - I would take my love for Jacob to the grave.

Then the sharp pain caused by her razor teeth emanated throughout my neck. I could hear the flesh tearing as she bit down, sucking my blood almost immediately.

I welcomed death and hoped it wouldn't take long, feeling my eyes flutter back into my head, unable to stay open. I saw the tops of the trees become a blurry green blob, and the blackness of the night melted into my line of vision. I knew it wouldn't be long now.

But before I succumbed to the feeling of nothingness, I heard fierce growling and loud paws clawing at the earth.

~o~O~o~

"Bells. Bells? Earth to Bella," I heard Jacob saying as I snapped out of my memory of being transformed.

"Sorry, Jake. I guess I got into one of those vampire trances," I apologized.

"I hate it when you don't move or breathe for a long time. It freaks me out. You gotta at least pretend to be human a little bit, okay?" he asked. I should have been insulted by his request, but I understood why he would say something like that.

He was trying to get used to the new me, too.

"I'll try." I knew I needed to tell him the revelation I had out in the woods that night - the night I discovered my love for him. Sitting this close to him stirred up feelings I hadn't been able to feel for so long. I shut my body down after Edward left, and then my blood lust took over after my change. There hadn't been time lately, or the right moment had never come, but now seemed right. I couldn't keep delaying opening up to him, no matter how hard it was to do so. It was now or never, as the old saying went. "I never thanked you, you know," I added quickly.

"Thanked me for what?"

"Saving my life."

He was quiet...too quiet.

"What's wrong?" I asked, not liking his silence.

"If I had gotten there a minute earlier, then you would still be-" he stopped before he finished, seeming to realize that what he'd say would hurt me.

"Human?" I finished for him.

"Yeah...I failed you."

"How can you say that? You didn't fail me. You saved me. It's not the happy ending we wanted, but we're together now."

"Together for how long, though?" he said with a touch of anger.

"We have forever now, don't we?" I couldn't understand where this sudden bitterness was coming from. He turned his body away from me slightly, letting out a deep breath.

"Talk to me, Jake. Tell me what's bothering you. We can't be a team if we keep things from each other," I urged. I felt him slipping from me, and I couldn't allow it to happen again.

"But your feelings for me are still the same as they were...before."

"My feelings?" I asked.

"You still see me as your _friend_, don't you? I still love you, but you'll always be in love with-" he paused.

"_Edward? _You think I still love him?" Jacob was always so sure of himself, almost to a fault, so it didn't cross my mind that he would still be so hurt.

"Well...don't you? Now that you're one of them_, _I'm afraid you'll go and try to find..._him_." He stood up from the bed and walked to the window. He leaned his hands on the edge of the windowsill, and his head slumped in defeat.

"You're my friend...my best friend...whom I love," I said. I approached him slowly.

"Yeah. You love me like a...a...friend and nothing more," he breathed.

That's when I knew that I couldn't keep my love for him a secret anymore.

He looked deflated and smaller. I couldn't help but feel that I was to blame for the turmoil he was experiencing. The way I'd treated him made him this way. I had become dependent on him in the most unhealthy way, and he allowed it to happen. He loved me, despite knowing I didn't love home back, or so he thought.

And I exploited that love, using it to my advantage, to keep me somewhat sane and survive yet another day. It took me dying, losing who I was, to finally see how I really felt about him. Fearing never seeing him again made my body flip a switch, turning it on to him - to my Jacob. My new body felt drawn to him, even though we should have been repulsed by each other.

I died and came back for him. He killed and defied his tribe for me. We certainly could become lovers and overcome such a simple thing as being mortal enemies.

"Jacob," I spoke softly, watching his shoulders flinch when I said his name.

"You have no idea how you saying my name makes me feel," he sighed.

He turned to me, widening his eyes at how quickly I became so close.

"You do the same thing to me when you smile."

I stood before him, touching him only with the tips of my fingers on his stomach, feeling his quickened breath underneath them. I could feel his body, even though his wasn't touching mine.

"Bella? I...I..." he stammered, confused by my sudden advance. He may have looked like a twenty-five-year old man, but underneath the muscles and male bravado, he was still an inexperienced teenager.

"Shhh. Please, let me talk," I asked, wringing his t-shirt between my nervous fingers. I didn't need courage to do want I wanted to do. It was just Jake, right? Being scared at the thought of him rejecting me was always at the back of my mind. I had done it so many times with him. Would he deny me?

I looked up at him, seeing so clearly how much I'd missed when I was human. I wondered for a brief second why it took me so long.

"I want you to know my last thoughts before I died that day, Jake-"

"You don't have to tell me. I don't want you to relive that nightmare again. I don't want to; I know that's for sure."

"I _want _to tell you." I lay my head on his chest, lulled into a peacefulness by his beating heart. I felt his warmth wrap around me when his arms enveloped my body. He felt like home.

"Bella, you don't have to-"

"It was you, Jake," I interrupted him, not letting him convince me otherwise. "We were in your garage, and I was watching you work on those bikes. I saw your face, smiling at me. I don't know why it took me until then to understand the way you looked at me, as if I were the only girl in the world." I stopped, hoping somehow my words would get through to him. _"_You know I love you," I finally confessed, baring my soul.

"You know how much I wish it was enough." His stubborn head still wasn't getting it.

"You gave me life again. You came back for me. That says something."

"You know I'd always be waiting. I told you so, remember?"

I laughed quietly and whispered, "Yeah, but wasn't it until my heart stops beating, though?" I paused, looking up at him.

He nodded his head yes, locking eyes with me. "When I said that, I never knew it would be possible for you and me, but maybe even then, I'd hoped you'd choose me...one day."

"It's you, Jacob...you're the one I choose."

I balled up my fist and softly hit his chest, not able to speak again. I just wanted to feel him hold me and give me more than a chaste kiss on the lips, like Edward always had done. I had wanted Edward in my past life, but my desire for Jacob was more intense than the juvenile feeling I had for my old love. Knowing Jacob wouldn't say no to what I wanted caused me to lose myself. It was freeing to know that didn't have to hold back with Jake, and that he wouldn't do so with me, either. I knew he wouldn't deny the human Bella, but would he want me now as a vampire?

His thumb grazed across my chin, tilting it up to his face.

"You know I've always wanted you." I felt his nose gently brush against mine, positioning his lips so close to my parted ones, and my skin tingled at the feeling of his hot breath. I waited for him, for the moment when he would kiss me as a lover and not just as a friend. When his lips finally met mine, I knew he wouldn't say no.

I had been a vampire for just a short while, learning to keep my thirst under control. The hunger for blood did take over but not as badly as I was told it would. I learned to manage the burning in my throat in a short amount of time. I wouldn't have been able to guess how long it would be before I'd physically want Jacob, but now my body sung for him. I needed him more than the blood I craved.

The soft, gentle kisses didn't last long because the pent-up sexual aggression he had controlled for so long came out urgently. I gladly let his mouth attack mine, matching the movements of his lips. Our tongues and lips explored the places we had only fantasized about, and I couldn't get over how soft and warm he felt. I found my hands wrapped in his short hair, pulling and tugging along with the assault of my kisses. Before I knew it, I had pinned my huge werewolf to the wall, pressing my energized body up against his.

A shiver rolled up my body as I felt how much he wanted me, his hardness pressed against my stomach. I wanted to attack him and to have him inside me, but with my new form, I didn't know how I could control myself and not hurt him. I paused for a brief moment, wondering what to do next.

"I don't want to hurt you. I don't know how to keep myself under control," I confessed.

"You can't hurt me, Bells. I'm a fast healer. I don't want you holding back on me. Not now...I want you too much."

I moaned unexpectedly when his hands slid down my body, resting at my ass. He lifted me, and I wrapped my legs around his middle. The feeling of his hard cock made me immediately drip with want. I had always wanted my first time to be slow and passionate, but now I just wanted to rip off his clothes and have him hard and fast. We could take our time later.

He moved across the room towards the bed; it was as if I weighed nothing being held in his strong arms. A thrill shot through me as he threw me on the bed. The headboard moved with the force, and the sheet rock dented, sending a small plume of dust in the air.

I knew he wanted me hard and fast, too, just by the look of lust that had in his darkened eyes. My cold body warmed just from the way he undressed me with those eyes. He shaped his lips into the smirk I loved, and my stomach did a flip, anticipating what he was about to do to me.

I raised my body on my elbows, watching and waiting. I squeezed my thighs together, trying to ease the increasing throbbing there. He walked to the edge of the bed, ripping his shirt off and sending it airborne, somewhere in the shadows . I had seen him dozens of times without his shirt, and I always knew he was beautiful, but tonight was different. There was no doubt that he was mine, and I was his.

It didn't take long for me to fly over to him, wanting to help him take off his clothes. His head fell backwards as I trailed my fingers all over his exposed flesh; his dark skin was beautiful. His muscles quivered under the coldness of my touch. Fire and ice - the perfect combination. When my fingertips snapped off the button of his jeans, his low, guttural growl made me hunger for him more.

In a flash, I'd pulled down his pants, finally releasing him. I stared for a brief moment, paralyzed by what my eyes saw. I forced myself to take a breath, just to make sure I wasn't dreaming and to free the tension building in my chest. I took my trembling hand and encircled it around him, wanting to feel him, so I slowly began stroking him. I heard a low hum coming from him, and his eyes rolled back into his head. I assumed he was enjoying himself. I wrapped my free arm around his neck tickling him a bit on his neck, feeling the hairs stand on end. I kissed his chest, wetting it with my tongue as I kept my steady pace on his cock. Another growl arose from his chest.

"Uh, Bella. I don't think I can wait," he mumbled.

"You want me now, Jake?" I asked, continuing my movements up and down on his dick.

"God, yes...I can smell you...it's driving me insane." My arousal was evidently was turning him on.

I released him from my hands and crossed my arms across my body, pulling my t-shirt above my head. His eyes widened, and I could tell he liked what he saw.

"You've been teasing me all day not wearing a bra, you know," he whispered. I laughed and lay back on the bed to finish undressing myself.

Jacob stopped my hands from unbuttoning my own jeans.

"No, let me," he murmured. I gladly relented and let him.

I watched as my pants were taken off and thrown across the room in one swift motion. All that lay between us was the thin fabric of my damp panties. I didn't care if he ripped them to shreds getting them off my body. My body was on fire for him, and I could feel my panties becoming wetter by the second.

Jacob placed one knee on the bed and spread my legs when he did.

"God, Bella," he whispered and took one finger, torturing me by running it under my silky panties to feel how much he turned me on.

"Go ahead, Jake. We have forever to take our time," I coaxed, needing him to take me now.

With my words, my panties were ripped off my body, and his chest lay flush with mine, pressing my taut nipples into him. I moaned at the contact of his skin on my skin. I tilted my hips up to him, placing his tip so close to my throbbing center. His lips trailed up my neck to my earlobe, sucking gently on my tender skin.

"You don't know how long I've waited for this...for you," he breathed in my ear. I responded only by pressing my pussy to him, letting him know I was ready...so ready.

I gasped when he swiftly entered me, easily filling me. I was taken surprise by how good he felt. I had always expected my first time to hurt, but my new body didn't register pain as it had as a human. It took me a moment to realize that I was actually making love to him, and it didn't take long for me to push my nervousness aside and focus on Jacob. We began learning how to move with one another, but soon we let our instincts take over and let our bodies react without thinking about it too much.

The sensation of having him finally inside me sent my emotions into overdrive. I could see now why girls would cry during sex. Just being his companion and friend wasn't enough. Loving him wasn't enough. Expressing the love I felt for this man in this way was the only way I could be connected to him on a plane beyond the physical, beyond the flesh.

Making love to Jacob solidified the intense feelings I had for him and connected us on a spiritual realm I'd never thought possible.

The bed creaked beneath the movement of our movements, and I knew there was no way we could pay for any damages done to the room tonight. We were fugitives, surviving day by day on little money, but I couldn't care less about holes in the walls or broken furniture.

"Oh...oh.." I seem to say over and over again, feeling the pleasure on my clit with each thrust from him. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs but could only muster the little whimpers and bits and pieces of words. The way his dick felt inside me caused my mind to fragment and work only half-way. His speed increased, and the force he added caused the headboard to splinter.

If I'd known how good this was, I would have jumped him a long time ago.

"I'm so close..." he grunted.

"Go ahead, Jake," I said, moaning as I did. I wasn't too far from being there myself.

"Uh...shit, Bella," he cried as his hips pressed hard into me, filling me as he came.

I grabbed tightly to his firm ass and pulsed my hips into him in shallow but quick movements, needing only a little bit more. My walls began to clench, pushing his cock into me as far as I could. The next thing I knew, fireworks exploded in my head, and my pussy tightened around him. I heard my voice scream his name and whisper _I love you _over and over again.

It was beautiful.

He lay in my arms, drifting off to sleep after we made love several more times that night. I looked forward to keeping him close and feeling him by me as he slept. I would never tire of watching him.

For the first time since I had been changed, I didn't worry about the future or the repercussions that came from being with Jacob; we would face the danger together as a team, maybe one day being free from any threat.

But for now, listening to his heavy breathing, I just knew I wanted to be his always, and I smiled knowing we had forever.

~o~O~o~

**I usually write Jacob and Nessie, so writing this one-shot took a little extra time. Thanks to Pemberlyrose and WolfGirlAtHeart for your help. I am forever in your debt.****Thanks for reading!**


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